Here is my plan to do anything I want, and get away with anything I want....
A. Hit head hard. Maybe fall of the table whilst changing a lightbulb, but land on my feet, but then stumble into a wall headfirst.
B. Be senile.
The head hitting thing will cause everybody to buy my senility. Here are a few of my plans for after I have hit said head...
Carry a pickle around everywhere I go.
Give it a cute nickname, like 'pants pickle'.
Ask people if they want to meet my pants pickle.
Ask people if they would like to pet pants pickle.
Look at my wrist and tell random people the time, even though I'm not wearing a watch. "It's 4:33". Make sure the time is always off by at least 9 hours.
Make every Wednesday cowboy day, wear all cowboy clothes that day. Make every Monday sombrero day; every Saturday will be oversized tuxedo day.
Change my name to Fox Pierce, because it sounds cool.
Decorate everything with Christmas lights and tinsel; listen to nothing but Christmas music.
And more!
This has been a Phoolish Report.
